"I can't"

It is so easy to say "I can't". We put up all these roadblocks in our life because we simply say "I can't". This defeatist attitude robs us of attaining our goals and showing ourselves all that we are and all that we really can accomplish. Lots of times we fear failure and so it is just easier on our egos to refuse to try.

I am not immune to this self defeating behavior. I say "I can't" to lots of things. For example, I can't be the mom I want to be. So I settle for the mom I am today. And I can't be the wife I dream of because I am just too busy. So I settle for the wife I am. You know as well as I do that "settling" does not make you feel all that great. We desire to be better than we are. We want to surpass all of our greatest expectations. We want to "wow" ourselves. We long to be the woman that God desires us to be.

It doesn't matter in the least what anyone else thinks or tells us. We can hear all day that we are great mothers, wives, friends, sisters. But we know in our hearts that we are failing. We say "I can't" to changing our behavior and our attitudes because that would be too hard. We want the easy way out. We don't want to work for anything. Just as we all know that "settling" feels bad, we also know that working hard for something feels great. The end result, whatever it may be, is awesome.

You may wonder why in the world I am rambling this morning. Today was a running day at the gym. At mile five I started to question if I should go any further. I was having a mental battle about the real purpose in attaining that mile six that I was after. I was in a lot of pain, I was feeling nauseous and I just wanted to stop. But I knew if I stopped I would be saying "I can't". Did I really feel that way? Or was I just "settling"? Was I willing to come home and tell Aaron I just couldn't do that last mile? The answer was a very determined "No". I knew in my heart that regardless of how I was feeling physically, I could attain my goal.

And so I kept running. After running for an hour and 15 minutes I was able to collapse on the gym floor knowing I had accomplished what I came to do. Sure I felt horrible. But mentally I felt wonderful. I did not settle.

Now I just need to spend some time in prayer. And then begin to work on all those other areas of my life where I am "settling" for less than what God wants me to be.